Birth and Choices

This all stems from a discussion group I am a part of, where we were debating the purpose, role and goals we should have as Doula's. I stand by my right to attend any woman who feels that my help will cause her less stress, more peace, less fear and more joy. Natural, or medicated, or c-section. I am not a judge, I am a comfort.

A piece of my mind... Why is only one way right? How can I say you shouldn't do what's right for you? But - You need to know what you want to choose. You need to care before you walk into the hospital.

What is it with women and pain? Why are we martyrs? I think women are martyrs when they stop trusting in the power of their own bodies wisdom and trusting the power of drugs. Yes that's right. I said it.

I support women through labor. I've seen them walk into hospitals and literally give themselves over to the medicine. They are doing fine- great!- and as soon as they see the hospital staff- bam! "I want an epidural- now!" Is it appropriate, is it necessary? Or is fear the great motivator?

Of course, the staff administers it to them. It is their responsibility to do so. If the patient asks for pain relief, you don't withhold it. Pain is whatever the patient says it is. Everyone has their threshold. And, they will be sued(rightly!) if they refuse to give it for any reason other than it is medically unsound.

But, I think women are sacrificing themselves. To medicine. When a woman is in labor and does so without medical intervention, natural endorphins are released and cause the woman greater satisfaction with the birth. Simple as that.

This is not a philosophical view, it's plain old evidence.

So there, I am a radical practitioner in saying that though many women think their birth experiences are good with epidurals(and they are!), they are fantastic without them.

I stand by women, and when I hear Doula's espousing only one way is the right way- well, I think it's wrong. I love my profession, my work- but there has to be a time where the sisterhood of our jobs has a boundary. This is it. I will not be accused of carelessness because I feel every woman has a right to choices and my standing by them through their labor.

Where is my line? I won't attend to women in elective abortions. I attend women who have elective c-sections, vbac's, epidurals, leboyer, home births. A woman giving birth, is still in need of support.

But if pushed, non-medicated births, gently and naturally- those are the best. I love those. But all are beautiful. A new family is a beautiful thing.

Oy, I really have gone off the story telling path. Okay, next time- a story.